


letting go (of us).

by thirdscventh



Category: GOT7
Genre: (almost) Divorce, ANGST ALL THE WAY, Alternate Universe, Angst, Asshole Jackson, Don't Kill Me, Giving Up, Heartbreak, Heavy Angst, I'm Sorry, Lots of tears, M/M, MY EMOTIONS ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE, Married Couple, Swearing, curse words, dad! jackson, i'm sorry (1), lapslock, mom! mark, pinch of fluff for like idk 1 second maybe, twin daughters - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 08:46:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10760775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thirdscventh/pseuds/thirdscventh
Summary: “you said you’re giving up on us.. and you stopped caring long ago.”





	letting go (of us).

**Author's Note:**

> it's been a while, angst.
> 
> ok so i kinda got this inspiration from nowhere today but also because some of the dialogue in here are what i want to say due to the things that've been happening around me lately so um yeah. also because recently i've been listening to emo songs.
> 
> so um anyway i hope you enjoy it?
> 
> and. i used three female terms on mark here. if you're uncomfortable, feel free to not read it.

i.

  


he checks his phone again for the nth time within the past few weeks, and yet again, he doesn’t get the notification he was hoping for.

 

dejected, he locks his phone again and looks out the window, trying not to crumble in front of his daughters.

 

_just a text won’t hurt,_ he bitterly thinks to himself.

  


ii.

  


“grandpa!” the two of them squeal and immediately crash into their grandfather’s embrace.

 

“oof!” raymond chuckles as he picks them up. “hello there, grandpa’s beautiful princesses~”

 

they giggle at the pet name.

 

“ah, i missed the two of you so much.”

 

“we missed you too, grandpa!”

 

dorine gives him a look, and he nods in understanding.

 

“shall we have dinner?”

 

“yes!”

 

he shoots mark a reassuring smile before he continues to coo at the girls in his arms, bringing them to the dining room.

  


iii.

  


“how have you been?” his mother asks with the same warm and loving smile he’s missed.

 

“not so good.” he sighs. he can never lie to his mother.

 

“have you tried talking to him about it?”

 

“..no.”

 

“well then, are you planning to?”

 

“..i guess?”

 

“sweetheart..”

 

“i don’t know, mom. it’s just-” he chokes on his own words and tears blur his vision, unable to continue his sentence.

 

“oh, sweetheart.” she engulfs her son into a warm hug, a hand running up and down his back soothingly.

 

“it _hurts_ , mom. i don’t want to be the only one putting in effort,” he sobs. “as much as i hate him right now, i don’t want him to give up on _me,_ on the twins, on _u-us._ ”

 

she just sits there, listening to him voice out all his pent up anger and sadness from the past few months.

  


iv.

  


“be good for grandpa and grandma, okay?” he smiles at the two of them. _at least there’s a reason for me to smile._

 

“okay, mommy!” they chirp.

 

“say goodbye to mommy,” dorine says, and they giggle as they clamber over to mark and smooch both his cheeks.

 

“bye bye, mommy!”

 

“goodbye, mommy’s little angels. i’ll see the both of you soon, okay? mommy loves you _so_ much.”

 

“we love you too, mommy!”

 

he finally gets up, and reluctantly heads back into the car, not before looking back at his childhood home.

 

he remembers his mother’s last words before he left. _this’ll always be your home, sweetheart. we’ll always be here for you, no matter what._

  


v.

  


he sits there idly, constantly unlocking his phone every minute.

 

_01:38_ , the numbers flash back at him.

 

_he’ll be home soon._

  


vi.

  


it’s five minutes to two when jackson finally makes it back home.

 

“hey.” he greets softly, the love and warmth no longer present in his tone.

 

“hi.” mark replies back coldly.

 

he strides past his wife on the couch awkwardly, heading to the twins’ room.

 

“they’re at my parents’.”

 

he turns around, raising an eyebrow.

 

“why?”

 

“is there any reason why you should care that they’re there?”

 

“i deserve to know, as their father.”

 

“ _father?_ ” he scoffs. “i don’t think you deserve that title, not anymore.”

 

jackson narrows his eyes, and growls subtly. “come again?”

  


vii.

  


he laughs bitterly.

 

“if you’re their father, how come you’re _never_ to be seen when they’re here?”

 

“i’m busy with work-”

 

“ _how_ many times have they asked me with the saddest faces i’ve ever seen on them, ‘mommy, where’s daddy?’ do you _know_ how many times they’ve gone to bed, disappointed?”

 

“i’m obviously at work-”

 

“ _work, work, work!_ it’s _always_ about work! do you even _care_?”

 

“i _do!_ ” he raises his voice, but none of them care.

 

“you _do?_ or did you mean you _did?_ ” he shoots back sarcastically, tears already welling up in his eyes.

 

“i said i care!”

 

“then why are you never home?! why are you always leaving us hanging?! why are you always disappointing us?! why are you leaving us alone?!”

 

“i _didn’t!_ i fucking care, mark! i _care._ it’s _you_ who no longer cares.”

 

“ _i_ don’t care?”

 

“you stopped asking if i was coming home for dinner, you stopped waiting up for me to come home, you stopped telling me everything. it’s  _you_ who stopped caring, not _me!_ ”

 

“ _me?!_ ”

 

“who else, then?”

 

the tears had already streamed down mark’s face, but neither cared anymore.

 

“i don’t think you realised. that because you stopped caring in the first place. i slowly stopped caring.”

 

“i’ve _always_ cared!”

 

“if you cared, we wouldn’t be like this now!”

 

“what do you mean it’s my fault?!”

  


viii.

  


he was tired of trying to fight jackson.

 

“look, i’m tired. we’ll talk about this some other day, okay?”

 

he chokes on his sobs.

 

“are you giving up on _us_..?” mark’s voice was barely above a whisper, but jackson heard it. he heard it, and it struck him.

 

he was speechless.

 

“i-if you are. say something, _please_. i-i don’t want to put in so much effort to salvage our relationship anymore when you’re giving up on us.”

 

silence, again.

 

“ _please.._ ”

 

jackson opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, the words not coming to his mind or mouth either.

 

“a-are you n-not ha-happy? a-are you tired of me, o-of _us?_ ”

 

they stood there, both in pain, letting the silence overwhelm them.

 

“ _jackson.._ ”

 

“what.” he visibly flinched, his tone coming out harsher than he intended to.

 

“are you really giving up on _us..?_ ”

  


ix.

  


“..no.”

 

“then why does it feel like you are..?”

 

jackson kept his mouth shut.

 

“j-just let me know if you’re giving up or n-not.”

 

“fuck, you wanted to hear it so badly, didn’t you? then fine, yes! i’m giving up on us!”

 

“i never said i wanted to..” mark’s voice was even softer now, and the tears streamed down faster than before.

 

he spares one last, hurt look at the man he used to love, before he whips out his phone and runs into their bedroom.

  


x.

  


he presses the speed dial button as he opens the closet door, yanking his suitcase out and throwing it onto the bed.

 

he places the phone between his left ear and shoulder, both hands reaching for all his clothes and yanking them off the hangers.

 

_“hello? sweetheart?”_

 

“mom, i’m coming home.” he manages to say, voice wavering.

 

_“sweetheart? are you alright?”_

 

“y-yeah. can you wait for me? i just need to grab some clothes and stuff, then i’ll be there in around 15. sorry to disturb your sleep.”

 

_“no, it’s fine. i’ll wait. take care, okay? i love you.”_

he almost sobs as he hears those three words. it's no longer said by the man he said he'd spend his whole life with, but rather by everyone else.  _it's been a while._

 

“i love you too, mom.”

  


xi.

  


he zips his suitcase shut as the last of his items go inside.

 

“w-wait. w-where are you going?” jackson suddenly appears at the doorway, face a mixture of shock and sadness.

 

mark ignores him.

 

he lifts his left hand, and spares one last look at the gold diamond ring on his fourth finger, before he roughly yanks it out of his finger and throws it back at jackson.

 

he wills himself not to look at jackson as his tears never seem to stop flowing, dragging his suitcase out.

 

“ _yien!_ ” jackson cries out and forcefully pulls his back to his chest. “don’t leave, _please._ ”

 

he feels jackson’s tears mixing with his own on his hands, but he can’t care.

 

“let go of me.” he says, voice laced with so much hurt and sadness that jackson thinks he could slap himself.

 

“ _no, please._ ” he tightens his hold around mark’s waist and shuts his eyes tighter, not wanting to let him go. “ _please don’t leave me, i’m begging you. please._ ”

 

“i’m sorry, i can’t.”

 

“w-why not?”

 

mark finally pries jackson’s strong grip off his waist, and musters the courage to turn around and face him. he gives himself a mental pat on the back for not crumbling in front of him.

 

“you said you’re giving up on us.. and you stopped caring long ago.”

 

“no, _please_ . i didn’t mean any of that. stay, _please._ ” jackson begs with all his strength.

 

“i’m sorry.” is the last thing mark says before he runs out of the door, suitcase in one hand and the other hand covering his mouth as he gets in the car.

 

“to where, madam?”

 

“ _home._ ” the chauffeur nods in understanding, and drives off immediately.

  


xii.

  


“ _mom!_ ” he all but throws himself onto his mother the moment he steps out of the car and sees her.

 

he sobs desperately into her chest. “he gave up on us..”

 

“sweetheart..”

  


xiii.

 

after he’s calmed down a bit and steps into his home, he’s surprised to see both his daughters up.

 

“mommy!” he forces a smile as he lifts them up in his arms.

 

“why are the two of you up?”

 

“because we miss you, mommy.”

 

he smiles through his shiny eyes.

 

“i miss you too, angels.”

 

as he sets them back down, they ask the question he least expected them to.

 

_“mommy, where’s daddy?”_

 

he crouches down till he’s at eye level with the both of them, and braces a smile.

 

“angels, listen. daddy doesn’t want us anymore. daddy’s tired of us, and he’s given up on us. from now on, it’s just us, grandpa, grandma, uncle joey and both your aunts, alright?”  


 

“it’s okay, mommy~ we love you!” he hugs them closely, thankful for the two of them.

  


xiv.

  


they used to be two lonely halves of a heart that eventually found each other after years of longing and yearning, fitting together perfectly.

 

now they’re just two broken halves of a heart that’ll never fit together like they used to.

 

jackson wang used to be mark tuan’s first love and husband.

 

now he’s just the cause of his endless heartbreak and tears, and mark just wants to forget him.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry my emotions are all over the place.
> 
> scream at me on twitter: @slapjes
> 
> leave kudos or comments if you liked this and have a great day,, if you didn't then um i hope you still have a great day.


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